


Gun To My Head

by ScarsLikeVelvet



Category: James Bond (Craig movies), James Bond (Movies), James Bond - All Media Types
Genre: Gun Violence, M/M, mentioned sex between underage characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-12
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:21:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22678627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScarsLikeVelvet/pseuds/ScarsLikeVelvet
Summary: James comes back from a mission and his lover's in quite a state.
Relationships: James Bond/Q
Comments: 2
Kudos: 28
Collections: 00Q





	Gun To My Head

"Hey, Ash", James greeted his partner, when he stepped into his office down in Q-branch.

Q didn't look up from the weapon he was tinkering with. He only tilted his head slightly and his lips curved into a soft smile.

"Back so soon, James?", he asked.

James leaned his hip against the desk beside his lover after closing the door and pushing the privacy button which turned the glass walls opaque.

"Yes, dear. The mission M send me on was kind of a milk run. Nothing too complicated," the Double-0 responded.

"That's great. Did you bring back your equipment?" 

Ashcroft sounded a little distracted. He grabbed a soldering iron and started to solder one thing or another inside the confines of the weapon. A moment later he hissed, dropped the iron and stuck his pointer finger into his mouth.

James sighed softly.

"Did you sleep while I was away?", he wanted to know while guiding Ashcroft towards the small sink at the back of the room. He turned on the lukewarm water and held Ash's hand beneath the flow. 

Ashcroft shook his head in answer and whimpered when the water hit his burned skin.

"Okay. So here is what will happen now, darling. You will cool your finger down. I will close down your little building project here and put everything away. Afterwards, I will put burn paste on your finger, wrap it up, and we will go home," he instructed.

Ash pouted like a little boy who's favourite toy was taken away but he did not protest. 

James pressed a gentle kiss against his temple before he started to do exactly what he had said. He put away the soldering iron and the disassembled gun was put into the small weapon safe in the wall. A minute later he grabbed the first aid kit and headed back to Ashcroft. He carefully pulled the injured hand out of the stream of lukewarm water and inspected the damage. With a sigh, he coated the blistered skin liberally with burn paste before wrapping it in gauze.

Soft whimpers accompanied his work and James wanted nothing more than wrap his partner up in cotton wool. But he knew Ash would get angry with him if he tried to do something like this. 

The agent put away the first aid kit and helped the younger male into his jacket. In a ploy to not be too obvious about his anxiousness, he wrapped his arm around Q's shoulder and guided him out of the office.

The young quartermaster did not protest the arm. He leaned against the older males side and followed him down to the Aston Martin DB10 he had built specifically for his lover. Barely hesitating he slipped into the car, buckled up and closed his eyes. 

James watched him for a moment before he closed the door behind him and slid into the driver's seat. The motor rumbled to life with a turn of the key in the ignition and James peeled away from the curb.

Ashcroft finally relaxed a bit and the motor's soft rumbling helped him to finally drift off to sleep.

When they arrived home half an hour later James didn't have the heart to wake his lover, so he carefully scooped him up into his arms and carried him into the house they shared. He stripped him down and put him to bed, knowing Ashcroft needed the sleep more than anything else, although food would be a priority in the morning. The young man had lost weight again.

James changed into a pair of soft linen pants and a t-shirt, before sitting down on the bed with a book in his hand and a cup of tea on the nightstand. 

Ash curled against his side and James gently let his fingers card through Ash's dishevelled locks. He opened the book and started to read.

A couple of hours later Ashcroft started to get tense in his sleep and soft whimpers escaped him.

"No … dad … no … stop it … please … don't make me do this … NOOOOOOOOOO"

The whimpers grew in intensity and before James had a chance to help, Ashcroft woke with a scream on his lips. He scrambled across the bed, nearly fell off and stumbled until he reached the corner beside the window, where he curled up shivering and crying, his hands grabbing and pulling his locks.

James gave him a moment to come to himself before he slowly stood and walked over to him. His motions were slow, non-threatening since he could see how on edge Ashcroft was. He knelt in front of him and all the while not saying a word.

Ashcroft was panting for breath and still panicking when James decided to intervene.

"Ash? Are you okay? Did you have a bad dream?", he asked softly.

Ashcroft tried to focus on him but found he couldn't. He just shook his head all the while muttering "No, no, no, no, no". 

James moved to hug Ashcroft, but the young man flinched back and James stopped midmotion.

"Ash? Can you do something for me? I want you to take a deep breath, hold it for three seconds and breath out while counting to four. Could you try?", he asked him and demonstrated what he wanted the Quartermaster to do.

James' voice must have cut through the panicked haze because Ash followed the demonstration and after a while, he calmed down some more. He slumped against the wall and shivered. Tears were streaming down his face and his hands shook like leaves in the wind when he finally let them drop from his hair into his lap.

"James," he whispered roughly.

Without hesitation, James slipped behind him and pulled him into his lap. His strong arms wrapped around Ash and held him tight. He knew it made the young man feel safe. 

"Nightmare?", James asked after a while.

"I wish," Ash murmured and curled against James' strong chest. 

"You wanna talk?"

Ash hesitated. "Maybe I should," he conceded after a moment.

James did not reply. He gave Ashcroft the time he needed, knowing the younger man liked to have all his ducks in a row so to speak before he started talking.

"You know I'm an orphan, right?", he asked.

James nodded. Most of MI6's employees were. The old M, Olivia Mansfield, had preferred it that way.

"Most of us are," he replied.

"Right … well … but most of … us … they didn't orphan themselves, right?"

Ashcroft's reply startled the Double-0.

"What?"

Ashcroft sighed and rubbed his face with trembling hands.

"I only ever talked with the police and my therapist about this so, please … bare with me, alright?"

James nodded. He would give Ashcroft all the time he needed.

The Quartermaster took a deep breath and interlaced his fingers with his lover's. The gun-calloused grip helped him to centre himself and after a moment, he started talking.

"My mum died shortly after I was born. Complications from birth. She ruptured something and bled to death without anyone noticing in her sleep. So it was always just dad and me. He did his best. Always encouraging me to be better, do better than he ever did. I skipped grades from the beginning and went to an all-boys boarding school. So it was a foregone conclusion my first sexual experiences would be with boys … older boys … at least for me. Now my dad and I didn't live in the city. We lived out in the country and he had permission to hunt, so I've always been around weapons. I've known how to handle them since I was old enough to walk and talk. When I came home for the holidays when I was 14 everything went to hell. Some teacher had sent my dad a letter, talking about all the things I got up to with the other boys and …," Ashcroft took another deep breath to steady himself. 

"My daddy put a gun to my head   
Said if you kiss a boy, I'm gonna shoot you dead   
So I tied him up with gaffer tape and I locked him in a shed   
Then I went out to the garden and I fucked my best friend"

James blinked. "Come again?", he asked softly.

"My dad … he put a gun to head and told me, he would kill me if I ever kissed a boy again. Being the teenager I was I argued with him. It escalated and he started to throw punches. I took self-defence-classes at school for years and knew what to do. So after I put him down hard I tied him up with gaffer tape and locked him in a shed … and then I went out to the garden, met my best bud and we fucked like bunnies out in the open. Dad somehow got loose. He kicked the door of the shed down and wanted to make good on his promise. He shot my bestie in the head while I was balls deep inside him and … it's all a little blurry from there. I remember blood and brain matter on my face. How I tried to wrestle the gun away from dad. More gunshots. White-hot pain in my leg … and I whited out with rage. When I came t my father's head was bashed in. Anthony was dead and I was bleeding out. Luckily one of the neighbours had heard the shots and shouts and called the police and ambulance. It was touch and go for a while, but I pulled through. I had already been on M's radar because of some of the stunts I pulled online. She helped me through the mess that was my life, took care of all the legal ramifications and prevented me from being taken from my school. She had legal custody for a while and adopted me when I was just shy of sixteen. She made the life I now live possible for me," Ashcroft told him. He stopped and did not dare to look into his lovers face.

James did not say anything for a while. Instead, he carefully mulled over what he knew about his lover. "So that's why you prefer to stay out of the field and inside Q-Branch as much as possible? It's not that you're not capable to do what needs to be done. You are … afraid of what you could do." The last words were nothing more than a whisper.

Ashcroft shook his head. "I've got a license to kill, 007. I've been out in the field. I simply prefer to stay in the background and give field agents like you the best equipment and bring help to bring them back home in one piece. It is more my thing. I am capable of many things. I could do your job … I simply prefer the one I have," Ash answered.

James nodded. "Okay … so … you killed your father with your bare hands" He trailed off and watched how Ashcroft shifted in his lap.

"Yes … do you hate me now?"

James shook his head. 

"How could I? You did what you had to do to survive. Your best friend died in front of you … you had to defend yourself. Am I happy you had to do this? No. Especially since you were essentially a boy when you did this. Am I happy you survived? Hell yes. I love you, Ash. You are IT for me. The One I will always come back to given half a chance. I will do anything for you and if I could, I would go back in time and take care of your father for you before you had to do this yourself. I don't know what brought these nightmares to the surface again, but rest assured, I will be with you, love. I'll be there to hold you, to listen to you … whatever you need," James said.

A soft sob was all the warning James had before Ashcroft started to cry in earnest. James held him close and soothingly caressed his back. He did not say anything else because there was nothing to say. 

Ashcroft cried himself to sleep and James followed him into Morpheus' arms after taking him back to bed.

~The End~

A/N: The story is inspired by the following verse of YUNGBLUD's song "parents":  
 _My daddy put a gun to my head_  
 _Said if you kiss a boy, I'm gonna shoot you dead_  
 _So I tied him up with gaffer tape and I locked him in a shed_  
 _Then I went out to the garden and I fucked my best friend_


End file.
